I strongly dislike strawberry tarts

I like pastry, I like cream, I love strawberries. But I do not like strawberry tarts. Mainly I don’t like them because they have horrible shiny goo poured all over them, but also I find that very often the strawberries are tasteless imported ones, the cream is cheap and nasty and the pastry is heavy and tough. But even freshly made ones with perfectly ripe local strawberries are still covered in the horrible shiny goo. So those are the main reasons I don’t like strawberry tarts – they’re nasty, and the horrible shiny goo is very nasty.

The other reason though, is a bit more abstract. I feel that strawberry tarts are lacking some fundamental coherent tartiness. Something about them never feels like they’re a proper tart – they’re just pastry, cream, and a couple of strawberries plonked on top (and then covered with horrible shiny goo). Nothing about them makes me feel that the component parts have been brought together into a new, coherent creation. They’re just disparate things next to each other with no essential tartiness in their being. And always the horrible shiny goo.